Family size is so personal. How many kids are right for your family, if you want kids at all? How do you know when you’re “done”? What do you do if you want a larger family and can’t make it happen by traditional means? And what happens if you decide you want another, have it, and then realize “that was a bad idea?” There are so many parts of family size that people don’t often talk about, because they’re just so tricky and personal.
I myself think a lot about the decision to have the first one. The idea of pregnancy was so big and scary. And then the whole raising-a-kid thing is so much bigger and breathtaking– both in joyous and painful ways– than I could imagine. The decision to add another, an exponential increase. And a third? I just don’t know. The process of having the second was nail-biting and scary. Not only did it involve miserable morning (okay, all-day) sickness up until about 18 weeks, M had a “single umbilical artery” that ended up not being a problem, but was one of those things that you don’t know for sure won’t be a problem until it’s all said and done and made more scary to me by the fact that I wasn’t in America for most of the pregnancy. I think I’m still not over the worry, even though I know that everything turned out so well.
A and I like to joke about it, and obviously she’s made the leap and has no regrets. I’m still on the fence for the foreseeable future. Our family size is perfect for now.
Except…. there’s some news at our house.
And it also didn’t come without internal debate and lengthy consideration.
The timing was finally right.
These guys– Sarah, Baxter and and Ali, so named by K the very moment she saw them, have joined us. Our girls are THRILLED.
They’ve been dressed in all manner of clothing and costume and have been found to be excellent dance and play partners. They were set up after the girls went to bed one night, and the first thing M said when she saw them, with a big, silly grin was “Hey, wass going on here?!?” K likes to dress one in a pirate costume and another in a princess gown– and I frequently find the two facing each other, the pirates arms around the princess’ shoulders.
They’re so well-loved that I’m in no hurry to remove that protective layer of plastic. It’s already saved them some scarring.
So I thought I’d share the news. These kids sure are quiet and well-behaved! No regrets. My own family expansion? Still up in the air.