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I’m Craftiest When I’m Not Crafty

February 21, 2013 By crafterhours 59 Comments

There’s this thing that happens when I wait a loooong time to post. Partly an out-of-the-habit “maybe I can’t do it anymore” feeling, and partly a list of things I want to share that feels so overwhelming that I couldn’t possibly distill what I want and need to say. Having been in that place for a while, I’m finally ready to try to say something, even if it doesn’t come out the way I’d like. I’m giving it my best shot. Bear with me!
There hasn’t been nearly enough craftiness in my world recently, and certainly not much blogging. Many other things have been happening, though. We found out that we’re moving next summer! This is both a good and a bad thing, in the way that most moves are exciting and terrifying at once. So there’ve been meetings with the realtor and lists of things that need to happen to get this house ready to sell, as well as planning to go to our next locale – Northeastern NC – to figure out where we’ll live. There’s also a lot of scratching my head trying to figure out how to neaten storage and toys and crafty workspaces so that prospective buyers don’t turn around and walk out the second they walk in.
My girls have found lots of ways to entertain themselves. They’ve not suffered the same lack-of-craftiness that I have.

There’s been a lot of winter hibernation and snuggling. You may’ve already seen this photo of one of my first two (beagle) children on Instagram. You may’ve also seen photos there from my trip to Alt, which I still want to tell you about, after I share the other things that’ve been happening.

There’ve been some sad days. I’ll admit that sappy posts about passed relatives aren’t always my favorites to read. I don’t like to think about the sadness that isn’t mine when I don’t absolutely have to. I know how selfish that is. But now I better understand why people share them. Because they have to. I have to tell you how special my grandmother Augusta was. In early February Grammy died. She was 94– no young’un, and completely happy with her long, full life– and yet I’m still so sad that she’s gone. More selfishness. I want her here. My greatest cheerleader, she applauded every creative effort I ever made and with crazy enthusiasm.

We made the trip to South Carolina to be with my family, and I dreaded it… until I arrived. It’s been a while since I’ve had to go to a family funeral, and I was amazed at the comfort I felt in seeing all of those warm and friendly faces join together in celebrating her. I don’t love photos from funerals, and my family isn’t the most welcoming of photos anyway, but this one comforts me. My Dad, my stepmother and my Aunt all on their way into her home church for the service. My Grammy’s children were the brave and cheerful souls that she worked so hard to raise. She faced heart wrenching pain and tragedy over the course of her life, and she was still so overwhelmingly optimistic. She had the sort of smile that you just couldn’t resist smiling back to– for the rest of the week. She had lasting effects.

The last conversation I had with my Grammy is a fantastic memory for me. She was normal Grammy, no sign yet of the respiratory illness she was about to face a few days later. She’d raised three children of her own, and I was able to share that we’re expecting our third in August. “Ooooh, Suuuu-saaaan” she’d said in her delighted, singsong voice. We spoke for a while about the logistics of raising three, and about how I was feeling.  I will always treasure the sound of her voice as she laughed, knowing so well what a blessing and challenge my growing family has in store. On our Grammy-celebrating road trip I snapped this evening shadow. Not much of a belly yet.

Since about week 6, I’ve felt really, really pukey. I went a solid 8 weeks without making any form of meal for myself or anyone else. I’d tread carefully only as far into the kitchen as I had to to get crackers or something to drink, and if my husband or someone else helpful wasn’t around I made a drive-through trip to get something edible for the kids. I’ve been doing as little as I can get away with. Not my style, and kind of depressing in the endless feeling of I’ll-never-have-energy again. I cancelled or delayed as many commitments as I could just to try to rest and survive. I’ve tried eeeeverything. Small meals and snacks, ginger, lemon, peppermint, toast, apple slices, preggie drops, seabands, B6, teas, acupressure, accupuncture, B6 + Unisom and  Benadryl. The biggest improvement happened when the doctor suggested I drop the prenatal vitamins. That change gave me about four days puke-free. Google is tired of me asking for new things to try.
In the last week or two I’ve had a little more energy, and every night I go to bed with the hope that the tide will turn overnight. As far as the rest of this growing family, the girls are ecstatic. K, 6, has a million questions about what she’ll be able to do to help, and has accosted babies and brought them to me to show me what a great big sister she’ll be. I’m trying to convince her that I don’t need convincing. The day after we told her about the baby, she brought a new family portrait home from school. I think she was so excited about the drawing she raced through her own name and skipped the letter “y”. M, 3, mostly bounces up and down and says with certainty that the baby is in her belly. And we just go with it. Also, she says it’ll be named “Flower.”
This image from 11 weeks is shockingly baby-looking. I’m just over 15 weeks now, and still not really grasping the reality. I’m way, way, way more emotional with this pregnancy than I was with the other two, and I cry every time I see the baby on the ultrasound or hear its heartbeat. I guess this sounds normal in the world of pregnancy, but I’m not still not used to it. I’m not usually a crier.
We’ll go in about two weeks for the ultrasound where we’ll find out the gender if the kid is cooperating. I’m excited to know, but don’t really have a feeling one way or the other about what it is. Every outside guess I’ve heard so far (except maybe M’s) is “boy”. We’ll know soon enough!
Recently I was finally able to stand at my craft table long enough to find the surface of it, which I’d not seen since before Christmas. It’s progress. I make an effort to remind myself almost hourly that I am indeed involved in a crafty endeavor, and that the other less important craftiness can wait until I feel better. It’s an exercise in patience. I definitely don’t feel like my normal productive self yet. But I’m soooo hoping it’s around the corner.

I have some impressive lists of things I want to do. In my mind, I’m ready to get busy! (My Pinterest boards are about the only things that haven’t suffered over the last 9 weeks!) I’ve just got to wait for my body to be ready to keep up. If and when it eeeever happens, I’ll be back to show you! Thank you for reading this long and eclectic post. It feels like a small victory to be able to come here to write and share. And so nice to know that the kind folks who read our blog are the sort to put up with my occasional rambling.

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Comments

  1. Suz says

    February 21, 2013 at 5:44 pm

    Sorry to hear about your Grandmother passing. She sounds like a special lady. And congratulations on your baby bump! I’m sure your craftienss will start to creep back in as your morning sickness eases! suz

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 21, 2013 at 6:00 pm

      Thanks! I keep telling myself that aaaany day now I’ll feel halfway normal. Halfway would be reasonable at this point!

      Reply
  2. Michelle says

    February 21, 2013 at 5:48 pm

    Delurking to say bless you. Your words about your Grammy brought me to tears because mine (93 at her passing) died two years ago this month. Your tribute is beautiful as is the legacy she leaves. Thank you for sharing.

    I was also pregnant with our third when my grandmother passed. That and all the extra stuff that goes with the third pregnancy made me mushy like you describe, which was uncomfortable for a usually stoic girl like me.

    Anyway, I just wanted to give you as much comfort and encouragement as one can . . . you know, with words over the Internet and all that.

    Blessings to you and your family!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 21, 2013 at 6:01 pm

      Oh, thank you for delurking. It’s not even international delurking day. :) Mushy is an excellent word. I’ve cried in front of total strangers. Have never ever ever done that before! Thank you for taking the time to comment. In my present “mushy” state it’s even more appreciated. :)

      Reply
  3. kristin says

    February 21, 2013 at 5:50 pm

    It’s funny; sometimes it’s easy to hide when you’re “going through stuff” on a blog (if you want), but sometimes it just feels like you need to share it too. Glad you shared all of this – sorry to hear about your grandma, but excited to hear about #3!! Congrats and hope you’re feeling better every day. Oh and two sergers?! What’s up with that? ;)

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 21, 2013 at 6:03 pm

      I feel like such a faker when I blog about crafty stuff when I’m busy thinking about other things. I think that’s why I just couldn’t blog. Well, you know, that and the puking. Thanks for the congrats. And I knooooow, 2 sergers. I really want to uuuuuuse them again! They’re eying me with suspicion.

      Reply
  4. Mie@Sewing Like Mad says

    February 21, 2013 at 6:58 pm

    LOVED this post about LIFE…in all it’s happy and sad aspects. Big congrats on the baby news. Pregnancy nausea is literally the worst ever. I totally know how you feel (mostly felt, yay) and it is one big pool of guilt, self-pity and tiredness – yuck!
    We live in Wake Forest – north of Raleigh, NC – and we absolutely love it here (of course I don’t know how northeast NC ;-). So if I can help with anything location wise please feel free to contact me: sewinglikemad@gmail.com

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 21, 2013 at 7:36 pm

      Thanks, Mie. Guilt, self-pity and tiredness. Yes. I’m totally glad I’m pregnant, but it’s kinda hard to be happy when you’re in the big pool. But sooooooon… climbing out. That’s the plan.

      Reply
  5. Leigh says

    February 21, 2013 at 7:58 pm

    This story sounds very familer. Minus the moving and your sewing table is cleared of more than mine. My third is coming August 11th.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 21, 2013 at 8:35 pm

      Congrats! Hope the familiarity is in the happier parts. :)

      Reply
  6. Anonymous says

    February 21, 2013 at 8:05 pm

    LOVED the blog, Susan. So sorry about your grandmother. So glad that you are feeling better. Can’t wait until you’re back in northeast NC. At least you know you’ll have a young helper available to assist with the girls, moving, baby, etc. :) Take care of yourself! Lyree

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 21, 2013 at 8:35 pm

      Thanks, and HOORAY for Beth! Can’t wait!

      Reply
  7. J Lara says

    February 21, 2013 at 8:06 pm

    Susan – Very bummed to hear about your Grammy. Can’t wait to see how the spring unfolds for you and your sweet family.

    xoxo,

    Jen

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 9:57 am

      Thanks, Jen. We need crafty hangouts between now and June!

      Reply
  8. lindsayinnc says

    February 21, 2013 at 9:04 pm

    Congratulations! Hope you turn the corner on the 1st trimester yucks soon. As Nicole would tell you I have spent several of our sewing nights laying on their couch not being crafty, the joys of pregnancy lol!
    Cherish the memories of your Grandmother, sorry for your loss.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 9:58 am

      If one is not going to feel like sewing, Nicole’s couch is the place to be! :)

      Reply
  9. Emily says

    February 21, 2013 at 9:27 pm

    Sorry to hear about your Grammy and congrats on the pregnancy! I was super sick with my daughter. The only thing I tried that you didn’t list that may or may not’ve helped is getting foot massages. Oh and finally having the baby many many weeks later.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 9:59 am

      I’m going to try both of those!

      Reply
  10. Beverly {Flamingo Toes} says

    February 21, 2013 at 9:42 pm

    I’m so sorry about your Grammy Susan! She sounds wonderful. Congrats on your new little one!! I hope you’re feeling better soon!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 24, 2013 at 12:28 pm

      Thanks, Bev!

      Reply
  11. Corinnea says

    February 21, 2013 at 10:12 pm

    Wow, you’ve had a lot going on. I’ve never stopped missing my Mema. Sorry. So glad you got to tell her about your one on the way.

    So, congrats!! I hope your sickness leaves soon. Morning sickness is one of the most horrid things ever.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 24, 2013 at 12:29 pm

      Horrid. But over when it’s over, at least that’s MY plan! Thanks, Corinnea!

      Reply
  12. Alison says

    February 21, 2013 at 10:46 pm

    Blessings to you during this time. So much heartache and unknowns intertwined with such excitement and happiness!

    I would love to know about the afghan in the top picture. Did you make it? I LOVE it!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 10:00 am

      Thank you! I didn’t make it. I rescued it from the linen section of my fave thrift shop. I’m imagining it came from a super hip granny. :)

      Reply
  13. Charity says

    February 21, 2013 at 11:02 pm

    Congratulations on number 3! We are due with our third in August too. =) I was feeling terribly uncreative for the past few months, but it’s starting to come back! Hoping you feel well enough to make stuff again soon. I can relate to the move too, but ours will be anytime in the next month… and we are just renters so it’s easier in a lot of ways.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 10:00 am

      Thanks! We are headed toward a rental situation for the next 2-4 years, and I’m sooooo looking forward to it!

      Reply
  14. Angel Jem says

    February 22, 2013 at 3:57 am

    My third was 11 this week. I love it but be aware there will be very hard and tiring times ahead…. Just relax and cut yourself a break from perfect and it should be fun.
    Sorry to hear about your Grammy. I still miss mine but it’s good that you have such happy memories.
    And moving? …. before or after the baby? How many major life stressors can you have in a year?

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 10:02 am

      Moving before baby. I’m not sure which is better. I think I’m glad it’s before. But I’ll ponder it again when I’m packing in week 34 and trying to find the toaster for the following few months.

      Reply
  15. Disney says

    February 22, 2013 at 4:47 am

    Oh, I’m so sorry about your grandmother. She sounds (and looks!) like a sweet, wonderful woman. I’m glad you shared her with us! No selfishness at all. :o)

    Also, I can totally relate to the first paragraph about not posting…and then fearing posting but also fearing not posting. It’s crazy putting stuff out there for the world to read!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 10:04 am

      Thanks, Disney. I was so lucky to have had her as my cheerleader for so long. And to still hear her in my head. :)

      Reply
  16. Christie says

    February 22, 2013 at 5:34 am

    Congrats congrats! And sorry for your loss. I finally stopped puking at 18 weeks with this one. And then got the most horrid stomach flu. I thought I’d never feel better, but I do. Still so very tired but not feeling so sick makes a world of difference! Here’s hoping you will feel better very soon!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 10:06 am

      I have been runnnnning from people who cough or sneeze or look green. Knocking on wood, so far have avoided the stuff going around. But geeeeez, it’s not over till it’s over. Have been watching your bump shots on Instagram! I used to think 18 weeks as a nausea endpoint sounded awful. Now I’d take it, just BE OVER, please.

      Reply
  17. Jane says

    February 22, 2013 at 5:39 am

    Speaking of Pinterest, I read a funny thing there today that said “congratulations, you two made a human with your genitals!” So yes indeed, you have been crafty. I hope you feel better soon! Accupuncture, sea bands etc did nothing for me either. The blergh will all be worthwhile in the end. Love the photo of your grandparents.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 22, 2013 at 10:07 am

      Ha! Thanks! I’ve seen that one too. Reminds me of my wide-eyed stare at EVERY pregnant woman I saw for two solid years after I found out where babies came from. “I know what you’ve been doing….” was all I could think!

      Reply
  18. barbara says

    February 22, 2013 at 1:56 pm

    Hi Susan and family
    Congratulation on your pregnancy. Sorry for your loss. It is so nice, that you got to tell your grandma about expecting your third child before she passed, though.
    I am sorry that you feel so sick. I felt the same when I expected my twingirls. I could not even think of going near the kitchen. But one day it will suddendly be over and you will feel great again.
    Good luck with everything.
    Regards from Switzerland
    Barbara

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 24, 2013 at 12:18 pm

      Thank you, Barbara. I’ve had 3 ultrasounds so far and with each one I expected they’d say “twins!” ’cause I felt yucky enough for two. Can’t imagine how sick I’d have been if there WERE two! :)

      Reply
  19. Nicole says

    February 22, 2013 at 8:50 pm

    Sorry about your Granmmy, excited about the baby – I’m due about the same time. On the tiredness bit have you had your vitamin D checked? I was super deficient and have so much more energy – even being pregnant and having 3 others to chase. I even read up a bit and one doctor (who wrote a book about it) says nursing mothers need like 4000 IU a day…email if you want more details and thanks for the great blog!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 24, 2013 at 12:19 pm

      I’ll ask at the next appt. I remember that I was low before getting pregnant and was taking a supplement. Maybe it’s time to add it back!

      Reply
  20. Sally King says

    February 22, 2013 at 10:27 pm

    Mom of three grown daughters here and even though I absolutely adored being pregnant (doing something miraculous every day) I distinctly remember the exhaustion with number three. Throw in your Grandma’s passing and facing an upcoming move, you and your precious cargo deserve some down time. Hugs!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 24, 2013 at 12:24 pm

      Thanks, Sally. :)

      Reply
  21. Annie says

    February 23, 2013 at 1:43 pm

    Another lurker peeking out from the background :) So sorry to hear about your Grammy, but so good that she had the joy of hearing your news. My daughter was so nauseous until she reached 16-17 weeks that seeing her suffering really took the edge off the pleasure. Salty crackers helped a teeny bit and changing the timing of the pre-natal vitamins – but mostly it was just getting past that long first trimester, I’m afraid. But she has a fabulous little girl now and claims it was all worth it. Of course, she’s totally exhausted now :) Just take as much down-time as you can because you really deserve some cosseting right now.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 24, 2013 at 12:24 pm

      Hi Lurker Annie! Thanks for taking the time to comment. :) I’ll take exhaustion over puking. Cosseting sounds good either way!

      Reply
  22. Kathy Haynie says

    February 24, 2013 at 12:48 am

    I enjoyed reading this post. Just popped over from The Red Kitchen because your comment there was so delightful. Congratulations on being “under construction”! Lucky little one to join such a loving family. So sorry to read about your family’s loss. Your grammy is a beautiful woman. Take care.

    Reply
  23. Kathy Haynie says

    February 24, 2013 at 12:51 am

    I forgot to say how thoroughly delighted I was with the first photo. I just looked at it again and I’m still chuckling. And you have a lovely craft area.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 24, 2013 at 12:21 pm

      Thanks. She’s always good for a chuckle. :)

      Reply
  24. cecile says

    February 24, 2013 at 12:34 pm

    Hi ! I never commented on your blog, but today I had to. I lost my own grandmother Augusta some years ago, and she too was a great woman. I don’t know you, and I agree, it’s a little weird, but I feel your sadness and want to send you some thoughts.

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      February 24, 2013 at 12:37 pm

      Hi Cecile! Thank you. The internet is kind of magically weird in how it makes you want to connect with people you never would have otherwise. And while it’s weird to feel comforted by someone you’ve never met, I genuinely appreciate it.

      Reply
  25. AnneH says

    February 26, 2013 at 3:52 am

    So sorry to hear about your Grammy – it sounds like she was a wonderful person. Sorry to hear you’ve been sick also but also very happy to hear about bubs – congrats! Don’t worry about non-productiveness – I’m sure it will return. It’s just your body telling you to slow down a little bit – take care!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      March 5, 2013 at 3:35 pm

      Thanks, Anne!

      Reply
  26. Elisabeth says

    March 3, 2013 at 11:19 pm

    Susan, I’m so thrilled to hear about your pregnancy, and I so deeply understand the feelings of frustration, lethargy, will-my-creative-spirit-ever-come-back…girl, it will! It just takes time, and rest, and (although I’m probably the least credible person on earth on this subject) patience. Take care of yourself and that sweet baby! I look forward to hearing more about your move–North Carolina is such a great place to live. Also, I’m so sorry to hear about your Grammy. I know she’s still cheering you on:).

    Reply
  27. Elisabeth says

    March 3, 2013 at 11:22 pm

    p.s. You may not be a fan of this idea, but I ultimately had to take Zofran for a few weeks during my early second trimester, and it worked wonders. We decided there was really no other way for me to continue functioning as a mom!

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      March 5, 2013 at 3:38 pm

      Well, I’ve actually had it in my med cabinet waiting… but the one time I’d taken it previously it’d caused *other* problems. Thankfully, I seem to finally be in the clear! Hooooooray! Thank you for the kind words. I’m enjoying reading about your baby and the return (of a tad of) normalcy!)

      Reply
  28. Miranda says

    March 5, 2013 at 2:50 pm

    Uggg. I remember those pukey times like they were yesterday. I think laying low, taking care of yourself and your baby, and letting the girls get crafty on their own might be just the ticket:)

    I read a week ago on my phone, and just now am getting here on the comment-able computer.

    Sad to hear about your move! We definitely need to have some fun before you leave!

    xo

    Reply
    • crafterhours says

      March 5, 2013 at 3:38 pm

      Yes! Must play! E-mailing you back!

      Reply
  29. Wendy says

    March 6, 2013 at 2:24 pm

    I just had # 3 last week. The vitamins made me sick too (along with other things… but they were the worst). Its the iron in them for most people (I was told). Hope that you feel better soon. I know its no fun packing/moving with a newborn hopefully it will be better before. Get lots of help. :)

    Reply

Trackbacks

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  4. Grammy's Sewing Kit - crafterhours says:
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